Water - Nature's Crack

Last night I was talking to Sparky. I had mentioned that I’m drinking new mineral water and that I just can’t seem to get enough of it. It’s so good. I’ve drunk almost a case in a week, by myself. I wondered if it had crack in it or something because I just can’t stop drinking.

Now that would be a selling point. Water with crack. I think I’d prefer water with speed, but crack’ll do.

Sparky, bursting my crack water bubble, suggested that it might have a high sodium content which would make me thirsty and thusly create my junkie-like tendency.

No, no I said. I checked and its only 28 grams per liter.

Hmm. 28grams? Am I a freakin’ mermaid or something? Twenty-eight grams of sodium per liter is like saltwater.

Turns out I read the label wrong and while its 28 mg per liter its more than double the sodium of our normal brand. No wonder I like this one better. That other stuff is crap.

So I read up on it. Now I don’t have heart problems and unfortunately I cannot blame bloatiness on water retention, so I figured the sodium levels in my mineral water really didn’t matter. Well it can, but that’s not my point. This water is within healthy limits. I SAID, this water is within healthy limits!

The point is, my water has crack in it and I love it. I’ve always wanted to be a junkie but without the Whitney Houston look, you know. (That girl is a “Say No to Drugs” campaign all by herself. Whitney before, Whitney after. You choose.)

Along the same lines, have you noticed that the water from the bathroom tap always tastes better than that from the kitchen tap? I think it’s the toothpaste. Man, can’t get enough of that bathroom tap water when I’m brushing my teeth.

I think I might be developing a problem.